Jason sat alongside Amelia in the skatepark. As always, she was being petty and small. Anytime a girl passed him by and waved, she blew up at him. What had he been thinking? She was obnoxious, rude, petty, jealous, everything he hated. It’s funny how being in a relationship changed people. It’s like a whole different person is revealed. It made his head spin.

“Hello? Jason? You know you could pay attention to me when I’m talking.”

“You’re always talking,” he blurted, immediately regretting it. He didn’t want to be a complete dick to her, especially when he was about to break up with her.

“Seriously? Why are you being such a jerk?”

Sighing, he sat forward, ignoring her glare. “I’m sorry, but we have to talk.”

“Good. I’m glad you said that because—”

“Amelia, we’re over.”

A heavy silence followed. Jason focused on the laughs of other people, the sound of skates rolling on the concrete and pipes, rather than on the anger he could feel radiating off her.

“Excuse me?” She jerked his arm back, forcing him to look at her. God, he hated looking at her. “No, we are not over.”

“No, we really are. I can’t do this. It was wrong to date you. Everything we did was a mistake, Amelia. I’m sorry, I just…I don’t love you.”

“Fuck you.”

“Amelia. I’m sorry. This is all my fault—”

“Damn straight! Everything is your fault. I loved you, and you led me on. You piece of shit.” She slapped him hard. He couldn’t say that he didn’t deserve it. He had liked her, but it had been a mistake. Every choice he had made had been a mistake. But…

“Amelia, you threw yourself at me. You literally threw yourself at me when I was most vulnerable. When I was dating someone else. What the hell did you expect? That I would really love you? Fuck, I’m sixteen. You’re fifteen! If you really believed any of that, you’re delusional. You were a mistake.”

Her chest was heaving up and down, and her eyes began to water. “It’s because of her, isn’t it.”

“Her who?”

“Lucita. It’s all about her.”

Jason sighed. He should have seen this coming. “No, it’s not.” It was true, in part. But he wasn’t happy with Amelia. She just made him miserable. His actions and decisions had all made him miserable. He didn’t like who he was with Amelia.

“This is so about her!”

“No! This is about us! I dated you because I felt like I needed to. Like I owed it to both you and Elizabeth to excuse why I cheated on her. I never loved you. You were a mistake, and we are done here.” Before she could slap him again, he turned his back to her and walked off.

Launching himself onto his skateboard, Jason realized he felt lighter. Now, he only had one thing to do.

Knocking on her window, Jason smiled at her. It was obvious that something was bothering her, and he wondered if she was still thinking about the selfish statement. He didn’t think she was any more selfish than anyone else he knew. I mean, they were all a little selfish. She was allowed to be human, to put herself first. But that was one of her faults; she put too much pressure on herself and put too much stock into what everyone else was saying. And with everything else going on in her life, Jason could tell it was getting to her.

Crawling back on the roof, he held the ladder steady while she climbed from her window. It really was a death trap, but she did it anyway, climbing onto the roof and taking a seat next to him. He didn’t understand how the girls did this so often. It was one thing to climb into her room, but to climb back up always gave him a little heart attack. And yet, the girls did it like it was nothing.

“Hey.”

“What’s up.”

“I just wanted to talk. I broke up with Amelia.”

“Oh? Well, can’t say I’m not glad. She wasn’t good for you.” Her smile was forced, he could tell.

“Are you okay? You’re not still thinking about what the girls said, are you?”

Lucita shook her head. “No, not about that. Francis…he said he wants to be with me, Jason. He said he’s still in love with me. He wants to break up with Liz.”

Jason’s insides squirmed. “How do you feel about that?” Please, don’t say you want him back.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what I want or how I should feel, or what the hell I’m supposed to do with this sort of information. All I know is that I’m confused.” She looked like she was about to cry.

“Lucita, don’t do anything. Don’t say anything.” He took her in his arms.

“But what if I made a mistake. What if I didn’t give Francis enough of a chance.”

No. “Lucita, you let him go. You pushed him and Elizabeth together. They both made the choice to be together.”

“But if he breaks her heart, it would have been my fault.” She pulled away, wrapping her fingers into her hair, her body shaking. “He’s right, everyone is right. I’m selfish; I only care about what I want, and I don’t even know what I want!” She was crying now, tears streaming down her cheeks. Reaching out to touch her, she flinched, pulling away. “Don’t touch me.”

“Lucita—” he stopped, catching sight of her wrists. “You said you stopped.”

“I lied.” Burying her head in her hands, she dug her nails into her face. “Everything hurts Jason. It all hurts. The little things, thinking, walking. Being alive hurts.” She pulled her head up. “Even my nails, touching my hair, everything hurts, and I just want it to stop.” Jason sat there, watching her cry, watching the moonlight bounce off the roof, all the cuts, the bruises. Every self-inflicted wound, internal and external, was laid bare in the night.

“Luci, I’m here. Silvia and Rebecca, we’re all here for you to talk to.”

“No. No. Just leave me alone.” Walking away, wiping away her tears furiously, he watched her climb back down the ladder and heard the slam of her window. Jason sat there, stunned. He was scared for her, scared by who well she pretended she was okay at school. Scared by how much damage she has done to herself. No one knew. And now Francis.

Clenching his fists, he made his way to his apartment.

“Jason?” stopping, he looked at Sivia, who was peeking up, pulling herself onto the roof. God, how much has she heard.

“Uh, hey.”

“Oh hell no, don’t ‘uh hey’ me. What is going on with Luci? Something’s wrong. I know something’s wrong. She’s off. You tell me right now, what’s wrong with her? What was all that?”

Jason didn’t know whether or not he should tell her. Luci had begged him not to say anything. But that was then…

“Luci found her dad. She…she has a stepmom and a little half-brother. Her family…they never told him where Luci was after her mom graduated college. They never told him they moved to Florida from Massachusetts. They lied to her and her mom. And now…her dad was a bit of a jerk about it. Like it was her fault. And… it’s complicated. But it made Luci angry, and it made her depressed. She’s been…” Jason let out a breath. “She’s been cutting herself, and now Francis—”

“Hold up. Stop. Rewind. Luci cuts herself?”

Jason nodded. “Yeah.”

Silvia sighed, rubbing her face with her hands. “Okay. And now, what’s going on with Francis? Wait, let me guess, the asshole is still in love with her, isn’t he?” Jason nodded and told her that Francis had the balls to call her selfish.

“He’s such a piece of shit,” she said, her fists clenched.

“Yeah. I’m going to deal with him. Look, just don’t act like you know any of this, okay. Luci, she doesn’t want anyone to know.”

Nodding, Silvia turned away, ready to head down the fire escape towards her apartment one roof over. But she stopped when he stepped up to her side. “Everything has gone to shit.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, but I can feel it. I told her, I told Lucita them dating was a bad idea, but she didn’t want to listen. She just…she wanted you back so badly. She thought fixing them up would let you back into the group.” Silvia sighed. “She wasn’t wrong. It worked. She did it all for you.”

They stared at each other, silence building between them.

“I wanted that too.”

“I know. Blake and I were the only two people against that stupid relationship. God, I don’t even know if Luci realizes how much she cares about you. You do realize that, don’t you?”

Jason nodded, blushing. “Yeah, I…I messed up.”

“We all messed up. The timings not right, you realize that, don’t you?”

Jason let out the breath he had been holding. He had planned to be honest about his feelings with Luci, but Silvia was right.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Keep Francis away and keep yourself in the friend zone. It’s what’s best.”

“Okay.” It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but it was what he needed to hear. He let her go first, standing there a moment to look across the complex rooftops. Pulling out his phone, he dialed Blake’s number.

“Yo, what’s up?”

“I need your help.”

“I can’t believe that guy,” said Blake, standing by Jason as they hid waiting for Francis. They had to get to him before Elizbeth did.

“Hey boys.” Jason turned, finding himself face to face with Evie, hair pulled back into a tight blonde ponytail. She smiled at both guys with that sleazy smile of hers.

“Go away, Evie,” said Blake. Jason remembered Evie had been one of his casual hookups at the start of last year. At least until Lucita came into the picture.

“Hey, we used to be tight.”

“Go away.”

Evie rolled her eyes and walked past them, popping her bubble gum in their faces. “Fine. See you later, boys.” She winked at Jason, leaving him with a queasy feeling. Just as she turned the corner, so did Francis, and it took every ounce of restraint on Jason’s part to not punch him.

“Hey guys.”

“Fuck you, man.” Jason hadn’t meant to blurt that out, but he did. He could feel Blake rolling his eyes by his side.

“What?” Francis looked between both of them, confused.

“Dude, calm down, he doesn’t know why you’re pissed at him.”

“Fine.” Jason grabbed Francis and shoved him into the empty hallway and against the wall. “How dare you call Lucita selfish. How dare you say anything to her. You just have no idea what she has gone through, and then putting all this shit on her is bullshit. You didn’t have to date Liz. You chose to.”

“Yeah, man.” Blake shook his head. “Those girls are friends; you can’t pit them against each other like this.”

“Fuck you, man.” Francis shoved Jason off him. “She’s the one who hooked us up.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t have to date her. And you didn’t have to tell Lucita you still loved her. Don’t fucking mess with her, do not go after her, or I will beat the crap out of you.”

“He’ll do it. I speak from experience.”

Francis glared at both of them, shoving Jason back further. “I will do what I want, so back off.” Francis walked off, pushing past both of them. Jason and Blake shared a look before watching him storm off. Francis was going to be a problem; they knew it. What they didn’t know was that a certain blonde-haired girl had been eavesdropping with a mischievous grin on her sugary fake face.